Just a week or two ago my dear old Uncle Bill
He went and kicked the bucket and he left me in his will
So I went around the road to see my Auntie Jane
She said your Uncle Bill has left you a watch and chain
So I put it on right across my derby kell
The sun was shining on it and it made me look a swell
I went out strolling round about
A crowd of kiddies followed me and they began to shout
Any old iron Any old iron
Any any any old iron
You look neat Talk about a treat
You look so dapper from your napper to your feet
Dressed in style brand-new tile
And your father`s old green tie on
But I wouldn`t give you tuppence for your old watch and chain
Old iron old iron
I won`t forget the day I went to London on the spree
I saw the mayor of London there That`s who I went to see
He came along in a carriage and a pair
I shouted come on boys All throw your hats up in the air
Just then the mayor he began to smile
Pointed to my face and said Lor Lummy what a dial
Started Lord-a-mayoring and then to my dismay
He pointed to my watch and chain and shouted to me Hey
Any old iron
I shan`t forget the day I married Miss Elisa Brown
The way the people laughed at me it made me feel a clown
I arrived in a carriage called a hack
When I suddenly discovered I`d my trousers front to back
So I walked down the aisle dressed in style
The vicar took a look at me and then began to smile
The organ started playing The bells began to ring
The people started laughing and the choir began to sing
Any old iron