Spoken: The world today seems absolutely crackers. There are fools and idiots sitting on the trigger. With nuclear bombs to blow us all sky high. It's depressing, and it's senseless, and that's why... Intro: I like Chinese, I like Chinese, Yet they're always friendly and they're ready to please. They only come up to your knees, I like Chinese, Verse: I like Chinese, There's nine hundred million of them in the world today, You'd better learn to like them, that's what I say. Chorus: I like Chinese, I like Chinese, They come from a long way overseas, But they're cute and they're cuddly, and they're ready to please. Verse: I like chinese food, The waiters never are rude, Think of the many things they've done to impress, There's Maoism, Taoism, I Ching and chess. Chorus: So I like Chinese, I like Chinese, yin and yang-ese. I like their tiny little trees, Their Zen, their ping-pong, their Verse: I like Chinese thought, The wisdom that Confucious taught, The Chinese will survive us all without any doubt. If Darwin is anything to shout about, I like Chinese, Chorus: So I like Chinese, Yet they're wise and they're witty, and they're ready to please. They only come up to your knees, Verse: (in Chinese) I like Chinese, Chorus: I like Chinese, Their food is guaranteed to please, Chorus: I like Chinese, A fourteen, a seven, a nine and lychees. I like their tiny little trees, Their Zen, their ping-pong, their yin and yang-ese. I like Chinese, Fade: I like Chinese, I like Chinese...