See I was getting older man
So I decided to do something a little smart
I put some dough aside and bought myself a yard
A little two up two down, quite a nice little pad
I scrimped and saved and pulled through
With a little help off my dad
Oh Oh Oh
So I was just settling in, as you do
A little party then there was the bang at the door
It was that fucking neighbour, he was going
Turn down your tunes or you'll end up on the floor.
I said oh this is well unexpected mate
I ain't looking for no fight
I tell you what any other time mucko
But not tonight, I said not tonight
Just do one, oh be gone
Oh Oh Oh
I said just not tonight
So he is standing in my porch man
In his briefs scratching his sack
I said I bet to find your cock
Your missus has to lay you on your back
And I could tell I wouldn't like this geezer
From the minute that we met
Cos he was in his garden
Talking to plants like they were pets
And he was one of them man
This geezer he's got fucking issues
I guarantee you his love life
Is all ending up in tissues
And he was one of them man
Spick and span, house was far too neat
And then I seen him picking litter,
On a Sunday off the street
I said what the fuck,
What the fuck is going on with you man
Just do one, be gone
What the fuck
Listen I tell you, you can just shoo
We could well meet one day mate
Maybe in a pub
I say finish your beer off,
you can donate that grub
Cos remember that time when you was in my porch, asking for a fight
Well guess what fuck its your lucky night
Its your lucky night
Oh do one, be gone
I told him do one
I told him be gone
But things have changed and I've moved on
Stories told and now I'm done
But things have changed and I've moved on
Stories told and now I'm done.